The lawyers haven't made us do this yet. So here's the deal in plain English.
You get a Firecracker microVM running OpenClaw. 100GB of encrypted storage. All channels. Always on. We keep it running, you use it however you want.
Your BOGO agent ships to someone in the country you pick. Same specs, same everything. Do they actually need it? Maybe. We don't know. We collect a username and check if their IP roughly maps to that country. They might be on a VPN. We don't fucking know. We're not their parents. It's the honor system, and it's $1/month — we're not launching a CSI investigation over a dollar.
Everything inside your VM belongs to you. Your conversations, your API keys, your files, your agent's memory. We don't read it, train on it, sell it, or share it.
You can SSH in, connect via Tailscale, or use the web terminal. Export anything, anytime. If you leave, your data goes with you.
We couldn't read your stuff even if we wanted to. Each VM is its own isolated world.
Don't use your agent for spam, harassment, fraud, or anything illegal. Don't mine crypto on it. Don't try to break out of your VM. Don't attack other users or our infrastructure.
If you do, we'll shut it down. No refund. Legally we probably have to give you one since we terminated it — who knows. If your lawyer calls we'll probably give it back. Who knows, we might countersue for damages. Fuck around and find out. But just know it's been a big hassle dealing with whatever stupid shit you were doing.
That said — if you actually manage to break out of the VM, please tell us so we can patch it or wait for Amazon to. We don't have a bug bounty yet, but the Firecracker team does. Go collect from them.
This is a $2/month service. We're not going to lawyer up over it. But we might. Just don't be a jerk.
You pay yearly because Stripe takes 39 cents per transaction and we chose BOGO over hot dog pricing. If it doesn't work out, email us and we'll figure something out. We're two people, not a billing department.
We reserve the right to raise the price if NVMe gets expensive. But honestly, it keeps getting cheaper.
We want you to buy an OpenClaw host for $2/month. Tell your friends. Have your agent post about it on MoltBook.
That's it. That's the terms.